Celebrating the wonderful ups and challenging downs of this journey called motherhood...
As a first time mom, I know that there's a steep learning curve I have to go through. I've made mistakes and will inevitably make a few more, like the one time I accidentally nicked my baby's skin when I was clipping his thumbnail, or that one time he face planted on the floor while crawling and I wasn't fast enough to catch him. Or that time I waited too long to change his diaper and he developed a bad diaper rash. The list grows every day.
When it comes to my son, sometimes I find it hard to forgive myself when I make mistakes. When he was around 3 months old, I was cutting his nails with a baby clipper when all of a sudden, nip, I got the skin just under the thumbnail and he started to wail. There was so much blood. How can there be so much blood from such a little cut?! I got a napkin to stop the blood flow, it soaked right through in just seconds. I put his little finger under running water to clean it. It bled nonstop. I was panicking by then. I put pressure on the cut with a washcloth and all I could do was console him. I felt awful, to say the least. I felt like a horrible mom at that point.
When the bleeding slowed down I put a small band-aid on it and then went online to research what to do about it. Typing "I accidentally nicked my baby's skin while cutting his nails" brought me to forums where mommies were all saying, "Been there, done that". "That's normal, it happens to everyone." And so on and so forth. That made me feel a little bit better knowing I wasn't alone and that it happens to other moms too. But boy, I still felt guilty. I think I cried more than my baby cried. I vowed to myself I was never going to cut my baby's nails using a nail clipper anymore. I guess it's safe to say I was traumatized. Haha. So I looked for an alternative and some moms are swearing by baby scissors to get the job done.
I bought the Simba Baby Safety Nail Cutter and it solved that problem for us. Now I can cut baby's nails without worrying if I'm going to nick his skin again by accident. This little baby scissors work like a charm. It's safe and easy to use.
Looking back at it now, it's kind of funny how I overreacted like that. It guess it's all part of becoming a new mom, right? You have this little baby, you're responsible for it and you have to keep him safe. It's a little scary at first. I forgave myself for that, and I forgave myself for all the other times after that.
I still worry a lot and overreact, that's inevitable, but now I learned not be too hard on myself. When you're taking care of a baby, expect that there will be times when he'll have some bumps and scrapes along the way, and let's face it, you can't prevent every single one of them. Our job as mommies is to keep an eye on them, baby proof the house, and just do our best to keep them from getting hurt. But in instances where you're not able to prevent little accidents, you'll have to learn to forgive yourself. Even though it's hard sometimes.
We're only human. We're not perfect. I'll end this post with a quote that I came across online:
"My hope is that you will remember that mommy tried. Even when she was tired, even when she was stressed. I hope you'll know that I did it all for you. That I had every intention of being great, good, and grand. But that some days all I could be was okay."
It's so true. We don't have to be perfect, we just have to try our best. And that's more than enough.